Spread The F Word

F Minus is the daily comic strip by Tony Carrillo
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Apr 1, 2009

Turtle Store

One morning, a few years ago, I woke up and noticed a scribble on my sketchbook. I always keep a sketchbook by my bed in case I come up with an idea during the night. I vaguely remembered waking up and trying to write down a thought in the dark, while giggling. In the light of dawn, the barely legible scribble read:
TURTLE STORE-- ANYTHING ELSE I CAN HOSE OFF FOR YOU?
I had no idea what it meant. I spent months trying to remember what it meant. I drew the concept a few different ways trying to understand it. Finally, I decided that it had no meaning. It was just late night nonsense. But for some reason, I liked it.
Time went by and I never had the guts to use an idea that I knew had no meaning. There are some who would argue I have done this many times before, but the truth is, every comic I have ever done has made a least some sense to me. Yet the turtle store kept popping up in the back of my mind.
Then I remembered that April Fool's day was coming up. The perfect excuse! I could draw a comic that makes no sense, and if people get upset, I just yell "April Fools!" and everything would be okay. So that's what I did.
And then I waited...
-"I am very sorry to bother you, but I can't make sense of today's turtle/hose comic and it's ruining my day. Any explanation you could offer would be greatly appreciated."
-"I just don't get it."
-"Your cartoon today is the first one that a number of us don’t get. It’s the one about the guy entering a turtle store with a hose and asking, “Anything else I can hose off for you?” Can you give us a clue to the humor in this one?"
-"Maybe I'd understand if I had a turtle."
-"This was the first comic in over a year I didn't and still don't understand. Help!"
-"You've stumped me and my coworkers. is this some kind of April Fools Day comic?
"
-"WTF was that?"
So... April Fools! Thanks for letting me get that comic off my chest. I apologize for any day I might have ruined.

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13 comments:

jono said...

That's awesome. I puzzled over that one for a minute or two this morning, and just gave up on it. I don't think I gave you the credit of doing an "April Fools" comic though.

Avi said...

I thought it was a good comic. In the morning before I went to class I looked at it and laughed. It wasn't till hours later that I realized it made no sense. But I still like it.

Jill Elizabeth said...

This reminds me of that "Seinfeld" where Jerry wrote something funny in the middle of the night and couldn't read it the next day. "Turtle Store" is your "Flaming globes of Sigmund."
Only the turtle store is kind of funny, mostly because there is something inherently funny about turtles.

Sabai said...

See, I refused to let it stump me, so I did some research. And I found "turtle hose" extensions at Home Depot. So, I figured there must be something called a "turtle hose" and thought I finally understood the joke. This post REALLY confused me, and now I'm learning that a turtle hose is just a hose that goes through a decorative yard turtle.

CIDU Bill said...

On the contrary Tony, the CIDU Page only bothers with comics we think are intended to be funny, but we just don't understand why. That's why you'll never see Zippy the Pinhead there.

Sweet Lou said...

Wow, with the amount of thought people seem to give your comic, I wonder what are the odds you can start slipping in subtle messages starting your own religion with you as the head! Totally worth a shot...

Ernest Pazera said...

At my work, we often adorn our cloth covered boxes with f-minus comics.

One of my co-workers has several "Worlds Worst Grandpa", the "world series of 52 card pickup", and the *OTHER* hard to understand fminus strip, "dolphin in a life raft"

Elsewhere we have the zombie vegetarians, the new one with author v. puppy (which is on my cube, as I am an author as well, and so I understand the sentiment), and "iron on tattoos" taped over "tea time clown"

If I ever get a tattoo, it'll be tea time clown, which I regard as the best f-minus ever.

In any case, my coworkers and I took one look at "turtle hosing", and knew that it was fantastic. We sat a bit, and tried to piece together the scenario that lead up to the panel.

I once owned a small store. I didn't sell turtles, but I did have a storefront.

Periodically, door-to-door solicitors would wander by with their services, like window washer.

So the hoser is some enterprising young man with a lot of zeal, but no common sense, going door to door and asking people if he can hose anything down for them.

The turtle store owner sarcastically says "why don't you hose off my turtle?", either believing that hoser is some sort of jokester (it is, after all, april fool's day)

But it turns out that the young man is serious about his entrepreneurial effort, which causes the store owner much consternation.

Then we snap the picture.

Tony said...

F Minunites...

Jeff said...

Okay, okay...not I get it. Nice one Tony. Thanks for telling it was an April Fools Joke, I am still stumped!

ELASTICWAISTBANDLADY said...

Replace the spelling of turtles with "Turdles" and the comic makes perfect sense.

Caty Neis said...

But I got it!

Adriel said...

TURTLE STORE-- ANYTHING ELSE I CAN HOSE OFF FOR YOU?

Maybe you were thinking something along the lines of a turtle store employee saying, "Is there anything else I can do for you?" but you added, "hose off"...

and/or maybe it had to do with something like your previous comics of the attacking/killer turtles?

or maybe you were thinking of a siphon hose?

I'm just trying to help ring some bells for you, I want to figure it out too.

Benjamin said...

Gary Larson got the same kind of response when he drew the "cow tools" strip for The Far Side.